The Politically Incorrect Guide to Barack Obama's First Year, conservative politics

Post- State of the Union Strategy and Damage Control

     Listen up, I’m driving today…no reflection on Rahm.  We’re jammed up in a big way…Obama Care, Crap and Trade on life support, someone turned on the lights  in  Congress and the roaches scramble for cover.  Hell I had to commit to Tax Breaks on National TV.  We’re runnin the risk of Recovery and a return to Prosperity…Damn Reagan.    Ok, we’re talking National Security, Economy  Obama Care, energy  last year in review ….        Oh yeah… before we roll, strike all reference to “Hope and Change ” speeches, docs, T-Shirts everything,  they can hardly keep straight face on the chamber floor…Senator Byrd  was laughin so hard the ol fart nearly stroked out

     Awright….  National Security….   Joe, listen.. we’re good without ya here, but on your way out see if you can hookup my stepbrother Bernard     with one of those stimulus jobs…. yeah,  Bernard, Kenya.  Thanks, lemme know….     Dammmn, ya just can’t write this stuff.   Did anyone think to      drop a dime to Bloomberg before sending Air Force One and two F-16 Fighters for a low altitude flyover at Ground Zero, buzz the  Manhattan Skyline, sending the entire city of New York into a panic, punchin’ up the terrorist alert…   for  what ….a damn photo op?  Hell for what it cost, ya damn well coulda  called  Spielberg.  Awright… lets move on  this one gets ugly...

     I tell ya the 09 apology tour, well…they’re lovin me in Europe ,but the Middle East they’re not buyin it.  To show how magnanimous I, unhhh…     we are,  we cut loose a few terrorist after extensive rehab, and swore no more Jihad ,  those ungrateful SOB’s  hook up with al-Qaeda, sign up for a Jihad hitch in Yemen, and get a bump to Senior Management Jihad.   Now hang on, this get’s better….  to thank us for our compassion and Gitmo hospitality, they send us the mother of all presents……the Christmas Day Bomber, who nearly blows up 220 souls on Flight 253 with a damn Crotch Bomb…are ya with me so far?  ….  awright,  so the passengers take this rookie suicide bomber down,  he’s hooked up, hauled away, and interrogated for all of 50 minutes while on pain meds having nearly blown up his own package, and FBI’s figured they got all the Intel that needs to be got.  He’s Mirandized, does the “LawyerZup” thing,  and  pleads not guilty…..Izzat’  it ?  Wait…. Oh yeah,  there’s more, turns out the Crotch Bomber’s father, the smartest guy in this intelligence vacuum had dropped  a dime to the U.S. Embassy in Nigeria with a heads up, his son’s turned to the “Dark Side” has a one way ticket, zero luggage on a U.S. bound Christmas day flight and no one in State, or Homeland’s  got a damn clue.  Now, dooya’ think  NCTC  Counterterrorism Boss Leiter can get his sorryass off the damn ski slope…..  I’m bustin’ a sweat on the back nine in Hawaii, break away for news and there’s Big Sis on the tube, doin damage control, assuring the American people the system worked before it didn’t work???  Janet, who n’ the hell prepped ya…. Kerry ?..... 

     Whajasay…. who.. damnnnn,  put Bloomberg on hold, no better yet givem’ Eric’s Cell .  Eric, listen, Las Vegas odds have us taking Point on Policy from Carter.  If that’s not bad enough, a few Dems quietly advised a low profile consult with Bush and Cheney.   So KSM anxious to get busy with the promise of 72 virgins, pleads guilty, ready to take the needle, and we do a 180, and announce a Civvy-Trial blocks away from Ground Zero. Hell that would have been a stretch even for  Carter.  NYC is out.   Re-opening Alcatraz  and transferring the Gitmo Alumnae and KSM to the left coast island paradise was a thought but,  Pelosi  figured as much, called and … well, …you haven't lived till the Princess of the Congressional Dominion has gone  off on ya....   Listen, Eric,  weather in Cuba is great year round and Big Mike said Cuba has a helluva healthcare system.  Something to think about… One last thing, Michelle went off on me… somethin bout getting busted in Veggie-Gate… see of there is any buzz over at Justice,  lemme know…

     Awright…     Casey …listen  ya  just don’t work “Diversity” into a press conference after a Fort Hood Army Major,  a  card totin’ Son of Allah Army Shrink, guns down, 44, killin 14,  while screaming allah akbar….  Rahm will get you hooked up with Mark Lloyd , Diversity Czar over to FCC,  in the meantime any noise from your people bout'  PC-Passes , you just tellem one thing... Deployment, ok?  Listen if ya see Joe on your way out ask him to hookup Auntie Z in Boston along with Bernard  he’ll know, …  yeah, yeah  we’ll do lunch….later.

Back  with Series Two:   Adventures with Obama Continues ....  there's no shortage of Beltway BS...

                                       Crap and Trade, Obama Care,  ObamaNomics , and Those  Unwashed Conservative Insurgents

 Obama's Next Budget Proposal   Fiscally Promiscuous

                                                          (and he won't Respect us in the Morning)